1st Course - Tuna Tartare

Quite possibly, our worst restaurant experience in a LONG time. 

If you’ve been reading this food blog, you’ve probably noticed that the overall ratings tend to be pretty “above average”.  Is it because I’m nice… eh maybe.  Is it because I try to find the positive in each dining experience…perhaps.  Is it because I don’t want to ruin a restaurants’ reputation based on my one experience…probably.  For instance,  what if I went on bad night, ordered the wrong thing, or just happened to get the only cranky waitress? No need to have a foul review living on the internet for all eternity, right?   Yes, in most cases…but my friends, this is NOT one of them!

Our Mangia Memoir (what we’ll remember):

Our pal Irmaliz was celebrating her birthday and her handsome boyfriend, Ignacio, planned a small gathering at a local restaurant on the water, for his beloved.  Very thoughtful and well orchestrated by Iggy.   He even negotiated a group discount and bringing in some of her favorite wine. Irmz was surrounded by close pals and a promising menu of delightful food.  Unfortunately, the menu did not stand up to the good company.  ALLLLL ABOARD!  There is a trainwreck-a coming!

The Verdict:

• 1 out of 5
• FOOD: Tasting Menu specifically – probably the tiniest portions ever.  It was almost comical. After 5 courses, we left hungry. Needed a double-cheese burger from Mickey-D’s.  “A for effort” in terms of creativity, but c’mon… yes, we know what a “tasting menu” is, but it was taken waaay too literally here.  We came to eat.  Sorry chef – food was good, but increase the portions, please!
• SERVICE:  started off bad and got progressively worse.  Remember that “group discount” Iggy organized? Yea, well that took 45 minutes to figure out.
• AMBIANCE:  standard attempt at a luxury Miami restaurant. Probably would have had a different feel if the experience wasn’t so bad.
• Would We Go Back?:  NOOOOOOOOOO

The All-American food goes “fancy” and super delicious at Senate

Having been absent from the Cincinnati-scene for over 2 years, it was inspiring to see some of the unique new restaurants that are now available in historical neighborhood of Over-the-Rhine.

Our Mangia Memoirs (what we’ll remember):

Zack, my awesome brother in-law, and I decided to meet for lunch.  The day was absolutely GORGEOUS. Perfect late-summer, early autumn weather…the sun was shining (yes, I’m sure we were in Cincinnati). We popped in to Senate , had a pretty damn awesome meal and then decided, since the day was so perfect to scope out Findlay Market just for fun.

Their menu changes often and they have “daily dogs” so be sure to become a fan of Senate on Facebook for all the latest and greatest.

The Verdict:

• 4.5 out of 5
• FOOD: Everything I put in to my mouth was mischievous, but in a very delicious way.  My only complaint would be that I looked like a damn savage when I was done eating.  The hot dogs are served on these  tiny wooden cutting boards (super cute), but they aren’t very large, so I had Hello Kitty remnants all over the place
• SERVICE: we were greeted with warmth (which is the polar opposite of Miami restaurants, so that was refreshing).  Our waiter was acceptable.  Not overly friendly, but knew his stuff and did a solid job.
• AMBIANCE: exposed brick, no nonsense. chill.  Zack wanted a decorative mirror or something to add a little pizazz.  The place is small, with one row of tables along the wall, with an open kitchen and bar area.

Items Ordered:

• Hello Kitty (hot dog) – all beef frank, with wasabi mayo, crushed wasabi peas, wasabi slaw and slab of smoked bacon.
• It was hot, sexy and delicious.  The combination of all the wasabi toppings definitely cleared out my sinuses, but the sweetness of the slaw helped counter it.  You’ll never hear me complain about too much bacon, but honestly this dog didn’t even need it.  Would have been fine without.  WARNING – it’s messy, like reeeeal messy, so if you are trying to impress that sexy man/woman across the table from you, they better like the look of destruction.
• Lindsay Lohan  - arugula, caramelized onion and bacon.
• Duck Fat Fries – yes and yes please.  Crispy, crunchy, just enough salt and how damn cute do they look in their little frie containers?
• Truffle Fries – double yes and yes please.  If I had to choose to only get one order of fries, I’d get the truffle fries. There is something about the aromatic POW!!! of truffle that really gets me going.

While living in Rome, I used to go to this little family owned restaurant near my friend’s apartment at the Policlinico stop on the blue line.  Money was tight, so we ate a lot of pasta.  One of my favorite meals was Sugo all’amatriciana.  They usually served it with beautifully al dente spaghetti or bucatini.  I thought it was time to bring this dish back to the states.

My family and I visited Jungle Jim’s International market and were able to find the number 1 ingredient for Amatriciana… Guanciale (aka pork cheek).  To read more about the Jungle Jim’s adventure, click here Jungle Jim’s Post

Our “Mangia Memoir” (what we’ll remember)

I know why my dad took us to Jungle Jims.  It’s because he knew I’d loooove it. And then we’d get to come home and cook together.  In the kitchen where I grew up.  At the dining room table where we’ve had so many meals.  Nostalgia.  Food brings people together. And in my family, cooking brings you even closer.  My dad and I busted each others chops all night.  “You are doing it wrong”.  “Move over, you’re hogging the counter”.  “When’s the pasta gonna be done?!”  “What are we gonna make Jaclyn?” (Jaclyn is my brother Nick’s lady friend that is a vegetarian.  I guess pork jowl would be considered meat.)  But, busting’ chops in my family is a sign of love.  I cherish these moments.

Amatriciana with Tagliatelle Pasta

• ¾ pound guanciale sliced thin and in pieces.
• If you can’t find guanciale, you can use pancetta
• 4 garlic cloves sliced super thin.
• I like it garlicky, so you can add/subtract to your taste
• I sliced the garlic with a razor blade. Yes, alla Goodfellas.
• 1 red onion, halved and sliced 1/4 inch thick.
•  Some recipes say to do it 1/2 thick, but I prefer thinner.
• 1 ½ teaspoons hot red pepper flakes.
• Obviously add/subtract based on how hot you and your guests like it.
• Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper, to taste
• 3 cups chunky tomato sauce
• 1 pound Tagliatelle or whatever long pasta you prefer
• 1 bunch of flat-leaf parsley, leaves only
• Pecorino Romano, for grating

Directions

1. Start a pot of water to boil for the pasta.
2. After cutting the guanciale into small pieces, put into a skillet (no extra oil) and begin to sautee.  Cook until it loses about half of it’s fat.  Do not overcook it, because it will turn into crispy pork bits.  Delicious, but not what we are looking for.
3. Remove guanciale from skillet and place onto plate with paper towels.  Pour almost all of the fat out of the pan. Reserve enough to sautee garlic and onions.
4. Add in onion and sautee until translucent. They should not have a “bite” or “crunch” to them.
5. Throw in thinly sliced garlic.  It will basically melt away into the pan. Thanks Paulie from Goodfellas.
6. Toss in the tomato sauce and simmer for about 10 minutes.
7. Add in the reserved guanciale and parsley and simmer for 5-8 minutes.
8. Add in cooked Tagliatelle pasta and let it set in the sauce for a few moments to soak up the flavor
9. Place into serving dish and grate cheese over top

The Verdict

• 4 stars
• Would You Eat It Again? Yes, for sure, but will most likely have to use pancetta instead of guanciale, since I probably won’t be able to find it in Miami, unless Laurenzo’s Italian Market has it.
• What Would You Change?  I committed a terrible offense and overcooked the pasta.  Was trying to do too many things at once.  Also, I left the guanciale in the skillet for too long and ended up with those pork bits I mentioned we don’t want.  So next time, I’d be sure to remedy these things.